funny sms

Larke wale: Hum ko larKi pasand hai shadi Kab Krni hai?
LarKi wale: Abi to larKi perh rahi hai..!
LarKe wale: Hmara beta konsa KaKa ha Jo Kitabain phaar dega?
............

Pathan Ne Gair qanoni Ghr Bnaya Ksi Ne Mshwra Dya
Ghr K Bahr Aisi painting Kro K Police Smje,
a Purana Ghr Hy
Pathan Ne Dewar pr likh dya"
Quaid e azam Ko Riha Kro.

..........

Pathan: light nai to khambekhat fan to chala do.
Pathan ki b.v: akhir pathan hi ho na aqal to hai hi nai,
fan chala diya to mombati bhujh nai jye gi.

funny sms

Dunya main bohot se network hen

magar 1 network
aisa ha jo sirf
AAP ki waja sa
chalta ha our wo hai

CARTOON NETWORK :-)

..............

DUNIYA Mein 6 Arab Log Rhty Hain
Lekin
Main Apko Hi SmS Kyun Krta Hoon?
Shyed Is Liye K Ye
5.Arb
99.Karor
99.Lakh
99,Hazar
999 Log
B

Apki Jaga Nhi Le Skty.
...................

Ek Din Tarzan apne sare kapre utar deta hy,
janwar usay dekh k hanste hen.
Tarzan: Tum hans kyun rahe ho?
Janwar: Hum sb ki dum peeche hy or tumhari agey.

.............

Gandhi said,'agar ap ko koi aik thapar mary to ap apna dosra gaal
1 aur thapar khany ke liye agy kar do'

But QUAID E AZAM said,'
if some 1 slaps u first time,
it is his mistake,
but if he slaps u 2nd time,
now it is ur mistake"
That's the diffrnce

b/w our QUAID & gandhi.
...........

Girl: Kmeez MeBreziar.?
Breziar Me Kiya.?
Boy: Bachon Ki Ghiza:
Baron Ka Maza:
Boy: Pent Me Andarwear.?
Andarwear Me Kiya.?

Girl: 10 Mint Ka Maza:
9 Mahene KiPiher Saza::...

...............

funny sms

2 Aadmi Sath Sath Bane Hue Toilet mai Bethe thay
Ek Ko Kabz tha
Aur
Ek Ko Loose Motion
Kabz Wale Admi Ko Loose Motion Wali Toilet se Pattt Patt Patttt Phrrrrrr Ki awaz aai
Awazein Sun Kar Wo Kehne Laga"
Yahan tu Ek Muskurahat Bhi Naseeb Nahi,
Wahan qehqahay Lag Rahen Hain"..

...............

2 PATHAN bank lootne gay
par GUN bhool gay.
Phir bhi bank loot liya.
KESE?B
ank manager bhi PATHAN tha.
Bola GUN kal dikha jana
Hum ko zuban ka atbar hai.
.
..................

2 Seeton wala 1 Chota sa Hwai Jhaz QABRISTAN me Gir k tabah hogia.
Govt ne aik PATHAN ko Investigation krny k liy beja.

Usny Govt ko Itlaa Di k..........!:

500 Laashen mil gai hain or Baqi k liye KHUDAAI jaari hai..

.............

3 SHEIKH picnic pe gae
wahan ja kar yad aya k pepsi to ghar bhol gae?

Decid kia k sub se chota SHEIKH ja kar pepsi le ae,
chota SHEIKH, main is shart par jata ho k tum mere aane tak samosy nae khao ge
2no ne kaha k thek,

1din guzra SHEIKH nae aya,
2 hafte guzre,
6 mah guzre
1 saal guzra
2no ne socha k ab samosay kha lene chae
jese he samosa uthaya
chota SHEIKH darkht ke peche se nikal ke bola?
JE INJ KARNA TE MAIN NAE JANDA.
,...........


A Man robs the bank....

Then he turns around and asks the next customer in line:
"Did u see me rob this bank?".
The customer replies: "Yes".

Duzzz.. he kills the man and then he moves to next customer in line and
says: "Did u see me rob this bank?".
The man calmly replies: "NO,
BUT MY WIfe did...

.................

funny sms

Dulha"On Wedding"Ask from Dulhan
U have Any Boyfriend before Marriage?
Dulhan: Silent
Dulha:Main iss khamoshi ko kya samjun?
Dulhan:kameenay Gin te lain de .....

..............

Dil k Mehmaan ban jao
Aankhon k Arman ban jao
Honthon ki Muskan ban jao
Chahy Sb ki Jaan Ban Jao
LIKIN Sab se Pehly
I N S A A N
ban jao.. PlzZ..

.............

Child:papa what were you doing with mom?
Papa:Beta petrol dal raha tha.
child:papa mom ki average chek karwaain subha driver b petrol dal rha tha.

...........

Dhoni: Mama aaj aap ne mujy plate me chaai (tea) kiyo di?.......D
honi ki mama: Kyo k cup ap k papa la gae han . . .Pakistan Rox . . .

...........

Cheri urri,
.'Kaw'wa urra.!,
Maina urri,.,'
Chi'ria urri....,
Gadha urra.,.,
'0ops..sorry.
jaldi main ap ko bhi urra dia...
..............

Bus conducter: peechay sab ne ticket le liye hain.. ???
Sardar G:Nahin G abhi tak tu 'hath' mein hi hain..

.............

Bry hi afsos ki bat hy Pora din guzar gya mgr jitna afsos mjhy aj hua hy
Mei bata nhi skta
Apne mjhy wish tak nhi kia
Aj"CUTE"people day hy..................

............

Boy's Room befor Marrige
Perfum
Love Leter
CD Player
Cards
Air Freshner

After Marrige:
Pain KilrsLoan Paprs
Unpaid Bils
MEdical Repots
Empty Walet&Pampers...
..
.............

Boy-Dear! Look into my eyes.
What u c?
Tell me...!
Girl-True love.
Boy-O anni di a!
Aida wada machhar nazar ni aya?
kad chayti.Vaddi aai true love di kuch lagdi
.............

Khoobsurat Larki

gadha NO.1: Yaar mein jis dhobi ke ghar kaam karta hoo, vo mujhey buhut marta hai.
gadha NO.2: Tu ghar chor kar bhaag kyo nahi jata.
gadha NO.1: Kya batau yaar dhobi ki ek bahut khoobsurat ladki hai,
vo jab bhi shararat karti hai to dhobi kehta hai ki,
teri shaadi kisi gadhe se kar dunga.
Bas yeh soch kar ruka hua hoo

Expectation

Expecting the world to treat you fairly
because you are a good person is like
expecting the lion not to attack
you because you are a vegetarian.
Think about it.

Bhabi

Pathan ney apnee bhabe ko katal kar dia
Police: tum nay apnee bhabe ko katal Kyu kia?
Pathan: Mere dost kay pas call aaee
Woh hans hans kay baat kr rha tha.
Main ne pucha kaun hai.
To bola tmhari BHABI

funny sms

mohabbat mujhe un jawano say hai

jo khaate peetay gharanon say hain

........

aap ka chehraa moti samaan
aap ka chehraa moti samaan
aap ka chehraa moti samaan
moti hamaray kuttay ka naam ..lolz

.......

itnay dino say jalaney nahi aya
jalti hui aag ko bujhaney nahi aya
aaj rooth gayi hoon tow
ullu ka patha mananay nahi aya.

.........

hum nay tum ko dil diya dildaar samhaj ker
tum issay kha gaey naswaar samhaj kar
.........

kon kehta hai pyaar mein pakrey jaye gai
waqt aney per behn bhai bun jaye gai .lol

.....

funny sms

Dedicatd 2 my All friends
Yaqin Pe Yaqin DiLate Hain Dost
Raah Chalte Ko Chotiya Banate Hain Dost
Pepsi BoL Kar KUPPI PiLate Hain Dost
PehLi Bar Zindgi Main TripLe Dikha Kar,
Life Ki First Muth Lagwate Hain Dost,
Roz Roz Ghar Mein Der Se Aane Par
Abba Se Gand Pittwate Hain Dost
Par Kuch B Kaho SaaLe Boht Yaad Aate Hain Dost
"KHUSH RAHO KANJRO"
.........


Do u know why spelling of women Starts with "W" ?
Bcoz All Questions in the world starts with "W"
What ?
Why ?
Who ?
When ?
Which ?
Where ?
Whom ?
&"Women"
............


Doctor:Zor se sans lelambi sans
Aur lambi Achank awaz i?
Khatak
Dotr:Lagta h apki paslee fracture ho gai.
Lady: Kamenay meri Brazear ka hook toot gaya hy.
...........


Dont beleive in money.
Bcoz it gives Bed but not sleep,
It gives Books but not knowledge,
It gives Luxuries but not hapines
So Transfer it to My account;
.........


Dost:Truck dekh ker tum kaanpne Q lagte ho?
2nd dost: ek truck driver meri biwi ko le kar bhaag gya tha.
.Her baar lagta he jese usko wapis karne aaya he.
.........


Dr: Aap pagal kesey huwy?
Pagal: Kuch time pehly main ne aik bewa se shadi ki
us ki jawan beti ne mere baap se shadi kr Li,
youn main apnay baap ka susar or meri biwi saas ban gai,
un k ghar beti hoi to wo meri behen hui keun k main us k baap ka beta houn
dosri tarf wo mari nawasi b hoi,
keun k main us ki nani shohar ka tha,
is tarha mera beta apni dadi ka bhai ban gia aur main apney betey ka bhanja aur...
Dr: bas kar saley mujhy b pagal karey ga.
.........


Dunya K 5 Mushkil Kaam
1).HATHI ko goud may uthana
2).ZARAFAY K ooper bethna
3).COcKROCH ko PYAR karna
4).MACHAR Ko kapray Pehnanaor
5).Apko bhool jana.
..........


Faqeer ny shaikh say kaha: 1 rupia dy do roti khani ha,
sheikh bola: 100 rupai doon ga pehlay yeh bata
1 rupia kee roti kahan say miltee ha?
.........


Garmiyan Agai Hain Apny Ser Pe Geela Aur Thanda Kapra Rakhna
Dimag Pr Suraj Ki Kiran Met Parny Daina
Kiun K BHOOSA Jaldi Aag Pakarta Hai
.........


Jab se aapko dekha hai,yaqin karen,
Raat,
Din.
Subha ,
Sham.
Sotay ,
Jagtay.
Khatay,
Peetay.
Uthtay,
Bathtay.
Aatay,
jaatay.
Mera Hans hans k bura hal hai;)
.........

funny sms

Chinese lady pakistani lady se; mere husband ka chalte chalte intiqal ho gaya!
pakistani lady:
bas behan, china ki cheezon ka yehi msla hai:-
.........


Bush:Meri sister ko beta howa hay
Zardari:Mubark ho
Bush:Magar afsoos
Zardari: Q ?
Bush:Baap ka pata nahi
Zardari: Koi baat nahi
Pakistan pe ilzam laga do.
...........


Boy1: Meet my Wife Tina
Boy2: Oh! I knw her
Boy1: How?
Boy2: V were caught sleeping 2gethr
Boy1: Wat da hel?
Boy2: during lecture In Math class.
..........


Boss 2 Secrtry: 4 a week v'll go abroad.
She cals husb: 4 a week I & boss r going abroad
.Husb cals GF: Wife going. Lets enjoy.
GF cals her student: 4 a week u r free.
Litle boy cals grandpa: Im free.
Grandpa(boss) cals Secy:Tour Canceld.
Im wid my grandson dis week.
Secy cals husb: Tour canceld
Husb cals GF:Wife not going
GF cals boy: Dis week ur class as usual
Boy cals g pa: Sory I ve 2 atnd my class.
G pa cals Secy:V r going abroad.2 b c0ntinue...:-D
............


A cute !£OvE $TöRY!
There was a husband who daily snt his wife a rose'
wen evr he was out of town'
1 day he died..
still his wife recvd a Rose Everyday
............


50 saal ka admi larki dekhne gaya
larki ki maa behosh ho gaihosh aya,
waja puchi ?
boli : 25 saal pehle ye mujhe b dekhne aya tah.
...........


5 reasons y u & me r frnds ?
1..........
2...........
3..........
4.........
.5............
Thapar prega zor se agr
kabi reason dhund ne ki koshish ki..
True friendship has no reason.
..........


1st Dost: Mujhse wada kar teri B.V ki pehli kiss mujhe lene dega
2nd Dost: Wada, Par meri b 1 shart hy1 Dost: Bol?
2 Dost: Main shadi teri behan se karonga.
..........


1Aadmi qabr par baitha tha.
Musafir ne pucha: dar nahi lagta?
Aadmi: darne ki kya baat hai..?.
Andar garmi lag rahi thi Tou bahar aagya.
.........


0nce der ws a pukha kutta.
He ws vry pukha.
He phiring loor loor.
He dekhya the sh0p of Qasai
He chuking one boti frm der,
nd nas gya.
Jb he guzra frm naalay alay pul to.
He saw aik hor kutta.
He became vry shoda.
His soch ws vry kutiyan aali.
He phonkia on him nd His apni v boti dig gayee.
MORAL:jo dujyan nal kutay aali krda a,
ona nal v kutay aali hondi a:-)
.........


"Ufone" Paish krta he 12 annay package apny un "Jazz"
Sarfeen k liye jinho ny 1st september 2008 sy apni "Telenor"
sim istimal nahi ki, ab woh "Warid"
ka 100 wala card charge karen aur Sub keh den...
Mazeed tafsilaat k liye apne "Ptcl" se dial karien
090000000 Ye offer mehmood ki biwi ki eiddat tak he.z
...........


"America se sheikh women ki dead body us k bety ne pakistan bheji.
Jis k sath letter tha k ama ki dead body ap ko mil gai ho gi,
ama ne jo kpron k nechy 2 shirts pehni hain wo bhaio k lye,
jo 5 socks k jory pehny ha wo sab k lye,
ama k srhany k nechy jo choclates ha wo choty k lye,
ama k balon ma jo ponyan ha wo choti k ley ha
aur agr ksi aur cheez ki zroort hui to jldi bta dena abba ki bi halt khrab hai..:-D

funny sms

1 Khudkush Hamla Aawar Taliban k pas gya
Sir Jee!Bomb May Barood Thora Kam Dala Karen
Last Time Humara Aadmi Jannat Se B Aagay Nikal Gaya Tha..!!
.......


1 larki ne apni frnd se pocha tumhara shohar dosri shadi kr rha hy tujhe koi etraz nhi?
frnd:nhi mujhe pata hy wo china ki hy zyada se zyada 1 saal chly gi.
............


Aamir khan ki film "Ghajini"
dekh k Adnan Sami ne faisla kia hai k
wo b ek film banaye gay
aur us film ka naam hoga
"WAZNI".;-)
.........


Zaheen lrka + zaheen lrki = DOSTI
bewakof lrka + zahen lrki = Love
zahen lrka + bawakuf lrki = Dates
bewakuf lrka + bawakuf lrki=???...Love Marriage.
.........


2 khusry baten krte hua ja rahe thy achanak 1 gir gya.
Or zor zor se rone lga dusre ne tasali de kr kaha
uth abdul razia himat se kam ly mard bn mari behan.
..........

funny sms

An application:
Dear sir,
Arz way k ajj kal mera school vich dil nai lagda,te raat nu neendr v nai aandi,
kiyun k school vich kurriyan bohat ghat ne,te meri class vich te ik v nai,
te jairriyan ustaniyan ne,oh sab ehniyaan kojiyan ne k veikhan nu dil nai karda,
te madam v koi khaas patakha nai,hor nai te kuj "kam vaaliyan" hi sohniyan rakh lavo.
Tuhadi mehrbani ho si.
urs faithfully,
ROSHAN KHEYAAL "Pappu poondi-baaz".
.........


Akeli ja rhi thi zindagi in mushkil raaho'n par
HAIRAN PARESHAN UDAAS THAKI Hui
phirek mor pr Aap mily
Aur bachi hui zindagi ki b WAATT laga di.. ;
......
.

Arz kia hay....
Heer Ro Ro kar Ranjhe se keh rahi h ay. . . .
Heer Ro Ro kar Ranjhe se keh rahi hay. . . .
Mujhe Roumal dey Kamine Meri Naak Beeh Rahi hai.
.........


Dad:
Son, what do you want for your birthday?
Son: Not much dad, just a radio with a sports car around it.
.........


DHOTI k 4 Anmol Faidy:
1. Sardi ho to upar orh lo,
2. Garmi ho to nechay bicha lo,
3. Nokri karni ho to pechay se utha lo,
4. Na karni ho to agay se utha lo.!
.........


Diff B/W Ign0rance & Patience?
Wen u see the mirror & u dont laugh at ur self dat is ign0rance &
wen i luk at u and i also dont laugh, dats called patience:-)
...........


Ek Ghar Se Hamesha Hasne Ki Awaz Ati
Ksi ne Khush-Gwar Zindgi Ka Raz Pucha
Shohar Bola:Mri BV Mje Joote Se Marti Hy
Lag Jaye To Wo Hansti HaNa Lage To Main.
...........


Ek Hoor Ne
Jannat Mein
Khudkashi Ker di
Pata Hai Wajeh Kiya Thi?
Ek farishtay Ne Hoor Se Mazzak Kiya Tha K
Tumhaari Shaadi Molana Fazal Rehman Se Hogi.
.........


Ek Molvi,ek Aurat se takra gya,
Aurat ghussy sy!Aap ko shrm nhi aati,
darhi rakh kr takkar mar rahy hain..
Molvi.!Mohtarma ye darhi hy break nhi.
..........


Girl: Najomi ! mere 2 affairs hain.
Un dono mai kis k sath shadi hogi ?
Wo khushnasib kaun hoga?
NAJOMI : Pehle se shadi hogi aur dusra khushnasib hoga.
........


Goldn Wrds
Mohabat main sab maslon ka hal French Kiss hai
Jo larki French Kiss na kre wo bewafa hai
French Kiss boyfrnd ka haq hai..
Profsr Imran Hashmi;-)
...........


Maalik:Abi tk tujh se machar nhi maray?
mere kano me gunguna rahy hain
Nokar:Sahab mene Machar Maar dye hyn,
ye to unki Biwiya hyn Jo Bewa ho k Ro rahi hen_!
...........


Police ne "3 aadmi" pakrey.
SHO (asking 01st): Tum kis k mureed ho ?01st: G....Tonsa Sharif" waalon ka.
SHO: Iss ko lock up me dal do,
..02nd) : Tum kiss k mureed ho ?2ND: G...Golara Sharif waalon ka.
SHO: Iss ko bhi lock up mein daalo...
SHO: (asking 03rd tm bataoO tm kis k mureed ho,G main"RUN MUREED" hoon.
SHO: Oey chotay bhaag ke ja 2 doodh patti ley aa eh tai apna" Peer Bhai" ey.
.........


Sheikh asked a parrot:"Mian mithu choori khain ga
"Parrot said:"Chavallan na maar, ap kadi khadi aa'':-
.......


Thapr mar k naraz Wife se Husband bola:
Admi usey marta hai jisse pyar karta hai
Wife Husband ko 2 thapr mar k boli:
Aap kya smjte han k mai apse pyar ni krte...

funny sms

Teacher
Jawani aur
Burhape me farak batao...?
Student
Jawani me mobile me HASEENO
k numbers hote hain,
Aur Burhape me HAKEEMO
k...!!!
..........


(New Meaning)
Bivi: Post paid conection.
Mehboba:prepaid conection
Mehboba ka bap: Network error.
Mehboba ki ma'n:Wrong number
Mehboba ka bhai: No signal
Mehbuba k shadi:sim block
Mehboba ki choti Behan:call divert
Mehboba ki saheli:Network change.

............


/DÜÅ/Jo mujhe bhool jai
Uska mobile toot jai
Charger jal jai
Uski sim block ho jai
Miscall kare to receive ho jai
Card load kare to balance hume aa jaye

........


"HIEGHT OF BADLUCK"A person who dials a number
(written with lipstick on a phone booth)
And.......... .His Wife recieve the phone.....!!.
............


1 admi apny dost k ghar gya
Ghanti bajany pr chota sa bacha bahir nikla
Admi: Beeta ap ka abu ghar pr hain?
Bacha.G vo to bazar gya hovy hain
Admi.Acha apny bary bhai ko bulao.?
Bacha Wo cricket khailny gya hain
Admi.Acha tumhari ami to ghar hon gi.?
Bacha.G wo apni sahailiyon k sath picnic par gae hain
Wo admi jal kar bola
To beeta ap ghar men kyon baithy hain.
Ap b kahin jao.
Bacha bola.Main b apny dost k ghar aya hova hon
...........


1 bar ganjay k sar par 8-10 baal ug aye
ganja naai k pas gaya,
naai gusse se bola inhe ginu ya katoon?
Ganja, shrmate hue bola..mehndi laga do:-)
.............


1 darya k kinare 2 sardar chammach se darya me dahee daal rahe thai..
pathan ne dekha to poocha: khoocha ye kia kar rhe ho??
Sardar: ham lassi bana rhe hain..
Pathan: ha ha ha ..
O pagal ka bacha Log is liye tum par lateefa banatay hai..
Itna lassi tumhara baap piye ga..??
.............


1 hindo bhagwan se:Bgwan ap kab khush hote ho?
Bgwan:jab indian film me koi willan larki ko pakrta hai or larki kehti hai.
Plz mujhe bhagwan k lye chor do.
..............


1 makhi ganjjey k sir par jaa baithi..
Doosri Makhi ne kaha"Wah kya ghar milla hai tujhey"
Pehli Makhi boli"Nahi,abhi to sirf plot khareeda ha.
................


1 memon jehanum me,
kisi ne usy pucha ary bhai memon to pakky namazi,
momin hoty hen ap yahan kese?
Memon: Jannat me ghar mila tha kiraye pe de dya.
...........


2 khusry baten krte hua ja rahe thy achanak 1 gir gya.
Or zor zor se rone lga
dusre ne tasali de kr kaha uth abdul razia
himat se kam ly mard ban mari behan.
................

4 Students:1 Frm HARVARD
1 Frm OXFORD
1 TEXAS &Sardar G Frm PUNJAB UNVRSITY
1comon Ques:Wat Is d Fastst Thing In World?
HRVD: Light
OXF: Though
tTEXAS: Blink of Eye
SARDAR: Loose Motion Bcoz Last Nght
I Ws Lying On My Bed & B4 I Could "Blink",
"Think" or "Turn On d Light" It Ws Al Over.
.............


Aaj Main tm se dil ki baat krun to
mind na krna
MAIN
Tum
Se
Bohat
P..
Py..
Pya..
Pyara
Hoon.....
.............


Acho sy ziada
Tum Ache ho
Sucho sy ziada
Tum Suche ho
Me ny kha
Mujhy Tum sy Mohabbat hy.
Wo Boli "PAPPU"Sharm kro
AbI Tum Bache Ho.
..........

Admi :
Malang se, Baba je meri BV bara tang kar di aiy
koi hal dasso...
Malang...
Puttar koi hal hunda tay Main Malang hunda.!
............


After an emotinal hug, Girl whispers 2 Boy
:"If u hug me once more like that,
i will be urs forever"
Boy: THANKS 4 THE WARNING!:-
............


Agar" DIL "ka naam" ANDA " (EGG)hota to FILMS ke nam is tarah hote
==> Ye ANDA apka hua
==> Hum ANDA de chuke sanam
==> Hum apke ANDAY main rehte hain
............


Agr koi ap k pas aaye aur kahe,
"tum bewaqoof ho"
Tou koi lamha zaya mat krna
us ko gardan se pakrna
aur kehna
!!!!Han hon to kia kar lo ga...
.........


Agr koi ap ko dophar12/1bjy kahy"GUD NIGHT"
ya sham ko kahy"GUD MORNING"
ya rat ko 12 bjy kahy"HAPPY BIRTHDAY"
tu samajh lain ky usky exams ho rahe hain
Aysy logon ky liay dua kejeay ky"ALLAH usy exams main kamiyabi ata frmaye AAMEeN
"mari tarf sy ap sb ko bohat bohat"EID MUBARIK"
...........


Aik KANJOS martey WAQT:
Begum Tum Kahan Ho?
Begam:Tumhare Pass
Aur mere BACHAY(kids)?
Wo Bhi Ap K Pas hein
To Phr Sath Waly kamry ka Pankha q chal Raha hay....?
.............

funny sms

Apko 1 Bar Hichki Aaye
To Smjna I'm RmembringU
2 Bar Aaye ToI Want 2 Meet U
3 Bar Aaye ToI MIS U
Phr Se Aaye
Pani Pee Lena.
Itna b koi wela nai :-)

.............


Apna future janne k liye

&

type kar k.
Apnay "Abbu" kay
number par send karein. ;)

..........


Child 2 dentist.!
Kia dard k bgair b daant nikala ja skta ha?
Dr:Nahi.
Child:Agar main nikal k dikhaon?
Dr:Nikalo.
Child:He he he he he he he..:-)

.............


Zar0ri elan
City me Kuch Khudkush Hamla awar dakhil h0 chuke hain!
Agr ap apne shehr 0r apni Salamti chahte hain
T0..Unki lambi umr k lie dua karen :-x

..............


Wife: Agar main gum ho gai to tum kia karo ghay?
Husband: mein akhbaar mein add doon ga.
Wife; kia add do ghay?
Husband, "jahaan raho Khush raho"

............


Today is "Blance Batao Day".
Aap apna mobile blance check kro aur
batao ke apke pass kitna blance hai.
Honestly.

............


Thief to a Man:
Apny paise nikalo.
Man: Do u know who am I?
I am Asif Ali Zardari,
President of Pakistan.
Thief: Acha to ustad hamaray paise nikalo.

.............


Teachr:Go ,
Went ,
Gone
ko punjabi main convert karo.
Student:-
O gaya...
O nass gaya...
O pharo edi pen nu..

............


Teacher-Apko Shahrukh Khan Ki Movie RAB NE BANA DI JODI Se Kya Lesson Mila?
Student-Ummeed Mat Haro Shadishuda Larki Bhi Phans Skti Hai.
.
...........


Teacher: BaTao Amrikio k Liye sub se ZaYaDa
shak ka Din konsa hota he???????
Student:....................Father's Day.. ;)

............


Teacher: tmharey abbu kya kaam krtey hein?
Bacha:"KFC" k maalik hein.
Teacher:nice "KFC" ka kya matlab hey?
Bacha:"KAKA FRUIT CHAAT"

............


Teacher: Naarre ko english may kya kehtay hai.
Student: S.H.D
Teacher: Kya Matlab ?.
Student: Shalwar Holding Device...
.
............


SMOKE Everyday
Hello
Hello wait..
SMOKE MeansS -
S end
M - Me
O - One
K - Kool $m$
E - Everyday
So Please SMOKE Daily Ok.
.
...........


Shohar apni BV ko dafna k ghar aya he tha k
achanak zor ki bijli chamki or tufani barish shuru ho gai
Shohar ne asman ko dekha or bola,'Lagta hai pohnch gai'
.

...........


Sare
Pakistan
Ko
Kam
Pe
Laga
Don
ga
Sara
Pakistan
Hath
Mai
Mobile
Pakar
K
Ye
hMsg
Parh
Raha
Hoga
Koi
Bhi
Insan
Farigh
Nahin
Hoga
............


Question
Aik badshah shikar par gya.
usne ek herni dekhi
us ka nam "teri" tha
badshah nay ghalti se usko goli mar di
Wo zakhmi ho gyi
phir ghoray k paoon nechay a kar wo mar gae
sawaal hai k
teri kis ne mari thi?
badshah ne ya ghoray ne.?
Reply must.?

.............


Paktel k Chief Executive ne mjhe kha k agr
tm meri beti ko pata lo to apna nam badal donga
Phr kia hua?
Paktel is now ZONG
Kamena mjhy chalnge krta hy..

...............


Najumi:Tuhmari life mein 10 larkiya aayen gi...
Larka: Waoooo...
Najumi: Ziyada khushmat ho 1 Bivi
aur 9 Betiyan hain.

.............

funny sms

Dil kar raha hai ka aaj aap ko akile main le ja kar
ek
K
KI
KIS
KISS
KISSA
sunao billi aur chuhe ka......
..........


Din Ko Kro
YARat Ko Kro
Ander Kro
YA Bahir Kro
Bed Pr Kro
YA Kursi Pr kro
Pyar Se Kro
YA Ghose Se Kro
1Bar Kro
YA
2Bar Kro....
Krna Tu He SMS
Jesy Mrzi kro.........
..........


Dukandar: Is bori pay mat bethna,
phat jaye gi!
Gahak: Kyo?
Is main ghubbary hain?
Dukandar: Nahi...
keel hain..

...........


Ek admi ne tung aa k kaha"
Is zndgi se to mout hi achi hai"
Ek dum Farishta aya or kehnay laga
k me tumko lenE aya hu
Admi:"Lo ab insan mazak bhi na kare"
.........


Ek ajnbi shehar ke
ajnbi gali ma
ek khirki khuli
ek prda hta
or ek masoom c larki
ne apni chanchal awaz mai kaha.
.pa amrood waly amrood kee pa nay?

............


Ek c Cheeta te ek c khota.
Dono hi shehar wich rende c
Cheete ne mobiL lia te khoty ne v le lia
Hun cheete ne sms khoty nu kita.
Te khota sms parh ria way.
Hun khota cheeta bann waste kesi hor nu a msg snd kr k khush hovy ga.
Pr onu ki pta k cheeta
,cheeta honda a tay khoota,
khoota hi hunda a.;-)

...........


ek larka apni door ki aunty k ghar gaya.
Usay wahan raat ho gai,
aunty ne kaha beta tum ander Guddu k sath so jao.
Larka bola rehne dain aunty,
main bahar sofay par hi so jata hoon.
Next morning a beautiful girl brings tea 4 him.
Boy asked tum kon ho?
Girl: main Guddu,
Aur App kon?
Boy: main Phuddu....!
...........


Ek pathan kafi dar se apna"NIKAH NAMA"
dekh rha tha,
Wife ne tangaa ker pocha.
Kia dekh rahe ho?
Pathan bola."EXPIRY DATE" Dhoond raha hoon.
..........


Fees maafi lae darkhwast:
To Da principal,
High skul,X.Y.Z.
Sir,
Gal eh hai k mere abby ny menu fees 500 RS.Dita c.100 ta dostan ny film ty lawa dita,
150dy samosy ty bottlan p liyan.5o da AZRA nu load krwa dita.Baki 200 englsh wali madm ty shart har gya.
dostan ne shart lai c k ohda sirf MATH waly sir nal chakar ay pr ohda te tohady naal v chakr a,
me hun kangaal ho gya wa ty ais lae fees maaf kiti javyain nwazish hove gi
Guddu.sharif student
.........


Ghulail Se Bachchon Ne Ik Baaz Mar Dala
Fauj Ne Dushman Ka Jahaaz Mar Dala
Mobile Users B Peechy Kese Rehte
Ultay Seedhay Shairon Se Faraz Maar Dala.

..........


Hindu 2 wife
priya
sawera ho gaya jago
Muslim:Begum chand dhal gaya jago
Christen: Darlingits dawn, get up
Sardar:Sohnyo utho tatti shatti nai karni?

...........


Hockey & Cricket mai kia fark hai?
Socho I know manzil blank hai but socho
Nahi pata
Hockey mai india 1 Ghanta Zaleel hota hy
aur Cricket mai Pura Din !

...........


Humari to kismat he aisi nikli
"Dost"
Zameen mili to bnjar
dost mile to kanjar,
Bakra mila to aandu
dost mile to gandu,
Badam mile to karway
dost mile to bharway.
.........


Inventions:
Aeroplane Wright Brothers
Cycle Macmillian
Telephone Graham Bell
Telescope Galileo
&
Exams???????o begerat ek wari lub jaye sai...;-)

...........


Larki k Gaal pr Gulaab maarny pr response
Englsh girl: U r 2 naughty sweet heart
Urdu girl: Nhi kro na Jan
Punjabi girl: Insan da Puttar ban kuttay dia Putra;-)

............


Math teachr sardar se:
agr tmhari 1 pocket me 1000Rs hon
or 2nd pocket me b 1000Rs hon to tum kia socho ge?
Sardar: "yar main kithey abbay di pant tey ni pa lai..
.........


Miss: "Aaj maine ghaass khaie".
Is ka future tense batao?
Student: "Ap kal Doodh daingi...:-)
...........


Mujh Jese SHAREEFLarke Ko Kia Chahye
1Larki Jo PYAR De
1Larki Jo ACHA KHANA Banae
1Larki Jo Meri KHIDMAT Kare
OR OR TEENO LARKIYAN Mil Jhul Kar Rahen. . .
.......

funny sms

A Sardar was touching a lady in a crowded bus.
Lady: Excuse me! Aap achha nahin kar rahe.
Sardar:Baji Itni bheer main iss se achha nahin ho sakta!

..................


1st Sardar:Yaar koi aisa karobaar bata jis mein ziada munaafa ho?
2nd Sardar:Aisa kar sardiyon main sasti Baraf le kar garmiyon main baich Dy...

funny sms

O sardar g!Ur friend is on date wid ur wife in park.
Sardar g ran 2wrds park & came back
saying: Oye pagal aiwan chakar pawaya..
He is not My friend....!:-

.............


PATHAN Apni BV k sath Raksha Me Beth kar Driver Se Bola:
Hum ko Pata He Tum Sheshe Me Se Humara Bv Ko Dekhega
Is lye Tum peche betho hum raksha chalay ga.

................


PATHAN Baap Ki Death Per Ro raha tha k Uski
Behen Ka Fone Agya Fone Sun
Kr Or B Rone Lga.Logo Ne Pucha kia hua?
PATHAN:Meri Behan K Abu Ka B IntiQaL Ho Gya....

...............


Pathan khudkushi per taqreer kar raha
Tha. Jazbati ho kar kehne laga Khudkushi haram hai
Gunah hai Zulm hai Is se behtar ha ke insan apne aap ko goli maar de..

.................


Pathan ki shadi lady trafic warden se hui,
Subha pathan cy doston ne pocha rat ko kia hua,
Pathan. Us raat mere 2 chalaan kaaty..1 over speedOr2 wrong way.

.............


sardar building se gir gaya,
Doctor said: He is dead,
Sardar Hosh mein aa k bola,
Main zinda wan
Sardarni Boli:Pya reh kanjra,
Tenu doctr nalon bohta pata ay.

.............

funny sms

1
Heer says to Ranjha:"ki khataya ve main teri Heer ban k"?
Ranjha says:"te main kehra Ranjha ban k
'D.S.P'lag gaya vaan.

.........

2
Grammer teacher to boy:Aik larki larkon se bat nahi krti
Es jumly main Larki kia hai?
Boy: Sir Larki Chawal hai...

...........

3
Girl-Hum Kaha Ja Rahe He..?
boy-Long Drive Par..!!
girl-Pahle Kyo Nhi Bataya..?
boy-Mujhe B Abhi Pata Chala kyun k Brake Nai Lag raha.. ;-(

...........

4
Faqeer: ALLAH k Naam par ek rupiya day do.
Shopkeeper:- baba kal aana.
Faqeer:- is kal kal kay chakkar mein is market mein
meray laakhon rupay phansay hue hain.

.......

5
Boy: if I try 2 kiss u..
Girl: me shor macha doon gi.
Boy: lekin yhan to door door tk koi nai hey
!Girl: I knowFormality to puri karni hey na!!!

.........